Teenage Angst

Screams. Slams the door shut.
I'm acting out. Its rebellious. It makes me feel alive.
Two years passed my teenage era and I decide to start living it now.
I'm acting out so I can get what I want and to prove to you I now have the balls.
I don't care...I'm done caring...
Its teenage angst baby. Its back full throttle. Deal with it.

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Just kidding, too mature for that sh*t. But I do miss it...should've lived it up while I still could.
Final projects, final papers, final exams. That is all.

Poison.

A psychic once read my palm (by force...he grabbed my hand). He told me I was going to be so rich that dollar bills are going to fall from the sky and that I wont even know where its all coming from. While this would make your ordinary money hungry Joe excited beyond belief...it makes me sick. Ready for a cliche? I promise you its not a cliche...it just sounds like one but its truth:
I would trade every single dollar I had for love and happiness in this lifetime.
See...told you it sounded cliche...whatever...love and happiness are much more important...I would blow all those dollar bills on designer shoes and bags anyways and although that would make me happy for a while...sadly, the adrenaline rush doesnt last.
So then, what constitutes as love and happiness? Those definitions, my friend, only belong to me.
I'm done with the excessive spending...none of it gives me satisfaction. So why does it keep coming my way? I didnt ask for it...and I certainly never wanted it. I am slowly being poisoned. Everyones watching me die painfully as I swallow it. I can assure you...coins do not taste like chocolate...except if they are made out of chocolate...in which case mine arent. FML.

Superficiality

You're the first one to call her out if she gets regular laser treatments.
Yet, would you have even considered her as a partner if she didnt?
Sweetheart, save your breath.
We all know you want your Aishwarya Rai Mr. Singh.
The girl with the turban just aint cuttin it.
Say what?
Yeah...you heard me.

Soul mate.

Everyone has one. That one person that you connect with. That one person you meet but for some reason you can never leave. They were made for you as you were made for them.
Everyone has one. Everyone except for me.
Oh soul mate: if you exist, please come find me.
I'm not doing so well.
It gets more treacherous by the day.
Patience is not a virtue I possess.

Living in Uncertainty

I go to sleep tonight wondering if I'll be able to wake up tomorrow.
I can't promise You much, can I?
If You wake me, I'll waiver.
But I can offer You this: I want to connect...to feel You endlessly and constantly.
Slowly I am starting to fall in love with Your love.
I'm trying my best with Your help.
No promises yet.
It's coming along...
One day I will wake up knowing that I belong to the Guru and the Guru belongs to me. For now I wonder and I most definately wander.

Drenched.

Silly me...
I always fall in love with those who don't completely love me back.
Friends that never give me the time of day...
Men that I don't even have a chance with...
Family that can't always be there...
All I wanted was a little attention.
I guess its my fault in a way; I fell in love with the wrong person, the wrong people.
He's the one person thats always been there and I can say that with complete conviction since He's never left me for another even though I've cheated Him many many many times.
He's the only one who truly loves me back, probably even more than I know.
I want to be drenched in You...I want to commit to You fully and always but I don't know how.
I just...don't know how.

Telephone

Ring Ring Ring? Hello?
I've dialed Your number my love, will You answer?
The phone is ringing with the tone of Your name...waheguru waheguru waheguru....
There are many callers...yet there's no call waiting...the line never cuts...there's no static...no dead phone...it is as clear as clear can be...
I've made the call to You....when You answered my heart and soul vibrated with Your intensity...
Today I send out some of Your frequencies to the world...someone who may need it right now...someone who feels disconnected from the line....or doesn't own a decent phone...or someone with a crappy phone plan.
Hang in there...your call will be answered shortly...