Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Understood.

"In this world I have seen love to be false"
Shabad by Guru Tegh Bahadur Sahib Jee
While questioning whether to sing this shabad or not, I thought to myself...have I actually experienced this? Have I actually seen love to be false? Do friends, relatives and even spouses just care about their own happiness?
Then...I realized the truth. I was rejected by my best friend and rejected by my parents all in one day. Now I know...I know that everyone says "Mine mine" but funny thing is, nothing goes along in the end. My foolish mind never listens, perhaps it never will.
Putting so much effort into recieving false love and giving false love...what use is it if you were to belong to the Guru?
So when is the day that I love the Guru? When is that moment where He resides in me and never leaves?
When will I be everything that everyone wants me to be? When will I be wanted?
My stupid questions could go on for ages. Excuse me.

2 comments:

Balbir said...

Dear Sister
This is my personal experience. If we don't trust or we have some doubt about Guru's words, a situtation is created by nature and then we have to believe. Its better to trust Guru beforehand than suffering later on. I was engaged to a girl who loved me so much. I loved her too and she was deep into my heart. I heard Guru Teg Bahadur Ji's Shabad which says that even your spouse's love is false. I had some doubt. But later on, our relationship broke and she did not care even to talk to me. Then I know that Guru Ji is right.
Good luck with Sikhi.

Balbir

Anonymous said...

penji, i totally feel for u and understand all ur qeustions because this is exactly how i feel sometimes.
Trust in guru maharaj and keep going...i know its easier said then done...but it's possible.
Everybody in this world, kaljug, is fake, pakhand and only waheguru is ur true love.
guru ji knows whats in ur heart and what u need most of all.
''Bin boliya sabh kich janda''
Its hard penji but take courage and be strong, never give up! :)